People and events are two of the biggest causes of our daily stress. It is important to remember that even though we cannot control what people say and do, or what surprise events happen, we can control two very important things: 1) we control our calendar, and 2) we control how we organize our time.
- We control our calendar. If we are too busy, then it is up to us to do the following to manage our calendar:
- Say “no” to events or people if we already have a full schedule for that day or week. We can always offer alternative times or days. This helps us feel in control. If we say “yes” when we really feel like saying “no, then we may end up feeling resentful, and certainly, we will feel overwhelmed and stressed out because we are cramming too much into too little time.
- It is important to maintain a balance between our work, social, and personal lives. If we don’t do that, then eventually, we will burnout, and on the way to burning out we will become short tempered, exhausted, and depressed about being out of control.
- In order to maintain balance, we must schedule personal time into every day. In addition, we need to schedule whole days where we focus on ourselves. The healthful activities that fall into this category are: fun exercise, meditation, yoga, movies, spa activities, hair and body salon activities, gardening, and/or any other activities that give us peace and joy. Please note: this is personal time, not family time, not social time, not work time, or charity time, etc. We need to put our needs first so that we can continue to support the other people and events in our lives.
2. We control how we organize our time (how organized or disorganized we are).
- In order to be organized we must use calendars, “to do lists,” files, and schedules to achieve this. Spending time to set up a good filing system will help us quickly address incoming events for that day and then place the information where we can easily find it for future reference. It is too stressful and wastes too much time when we can’t find information that is not filed in the right place.
- The most important way to stay organized is to check our “to do list” several times a day and to reorganize when emergencies occur or when we say “yes” to too many things. It is not uncommon for us to have surprise events happen, which will require us to reprioritize our list for that day in order to stay organized. It may mean several items fall off today’s list and float to the next day. That should cause us to immediately adjust the next day’s schedules, etc.
- The key to staying organized is being a constant schedule overseer so we do not allow things to pile up. Checking off items on our “to do list” as they are completed gives us a sense of control and accomplishment. Continuing to add, subtract, and reprioritize items on our list allows us to manage our time the way we want.
A final note: I recommend the book titled “Boundaries” by Dr. Cloud and Dr. Townsend. By setting and keeping good boundaries we protect ourselves, our time, and the things that are most important to us in life.
My favorite time for myself is being in nature. This is a pileated woodpecker in our back yard.
